So you split up and maybe even got back together for a while thanks to my How To Get Your Ex Back guide. Yet here you are now, single again. Whatever the reason and however much you question what happened, life must go on. Having reached that point of no return, it makes sense to try and get over it rather than get back your ex. Here are some ways you can help yourself not look back down memory lane.

• Avoid the places you used to frequent together. If you must go there again, make new memories, depending on how you tend to react.

• Maybe you are not yet – or ever – ready to tear up those photos, but at least keep them out of sight. Preferably somewhere where you will easily forget them.

• Unfollow them on Facebook or better still if you are up for it, unfriend them so that you are unable to see their latest private photos if tempted. There is nothing more bittersweet than seeing their eyes look at you again on the screen.

• Delete all the photos of you together from your Facebook account so that no memory reminders surface in your feed.

• Meet new people, discover new places to go, make a whole different life from the one you had together.

• Give or throw away items that remind you too much of your time together. As for valuables such as an engagement ring or similar, sell the item and use the money to buy something that reflects who you are now.

• Make sure you aren’t only wistful about the relationship because you are lonely. In that case, get new friends (or a dog!) but NEVER your ex back for such a reason.

• Never ever under no circumstance should you accept to meet up again or try to remain friends. This is suicide to any potential new relationship.

Once you come to terms with that your previous relationship is now firmly in the past, look around you and you will see potential dates everywhere. From the cashier at the supermarket or the waitress at your favourite diner to the person you bumped into as you entered the lift at your office building, you never know who might be your next hot date. One thing you should keep in mind as you start dating new people is to never compare them to your ex.

All the above said, do not force yourself if you are not as yet at the point where you are OK with any of these suggestions. After all, we all heal in our own different ways.

Further reading:

40 lovesmart practices

Dating advice: what to do if he pulls back or disappears

Can my dates smell the desperation?