Who needs flying cars?
If you’re already unsure on how you feel about high-tech sex toys, rest assured you’re not alone. I’m very happy with my traditional dildo and vibrator starter pack, thank you very much. But alas, the world must progress, and vibrations alone just don’t cut it anymore, which is why we’d like to introduce:
The Lush, a vibrator that connects to your iPhone and your – wait for it – Apple Watch. The technology behind it is referred to as teledildonics. What a great age to be alive. Basically, the quantum leap here was that the dildo can now be controlled by a partner with simple motions, like turning their wrists. But I say, you’re both there, in the same room! Why not just get down to business?!
The Eva Dame, which coincidentally was not named after me or the portal you’re on. But this wonderful contraption stays in place thanks to its flexible wings, leaving you to focus on your masturbation while boosting stimulation. It also comes in aqua and lavender, like it matters… Oh, and to make it even more 21st century, it was also crowdfunded on IndieGogo!
The Hello Touch, a hand-held (worn?) vibrator that’s been hailed as the smallest of its kind. What is it? It’s two super-small vibration pods encased within silicone pads that can be controlled using the toggle on the wristband. The future of sex really is ergonomic!
The Fleshlight Launchpad, a blackhole that men can stick their penises in and which also gives them the possibility to watch porn. What makes it high-tech? Well, imagine the advantages of point-of-view porn! It’s like being there in person, only… You’re not!
The PicoBong Transformer, the world’s first gender-neutral toy. Or, as many people have pointed out, a double-edged dildo. Yet, according to its creators, it’s much more than that, and can double as a cock ring, a clitoral massager, a prostate massager and even a skipping rope (I made up the last one).
So my friends, there you are. And for all my cynicism on the matter, I have to admit that they haven’t turned me off, so there’s definitely something there!
Have you come across any more high-tech sex toys?
Let us know about them in the comments section below.