There are some pretty mind-boggling theories circulating the weird wide web!
You’ve probably read about chemtrails and how the US Government planted bombs within the World Trade Centre, but trust me, nothing in your life could’ve prepared you for what you’re about to read.
Katy Perry is actually Jonbenet Ramsey
On Christmas Day 1996, the mysterious murder of a six-year old pageant queen shook America to its core. Fast forward a few years, and we realise that Jonbenet didn’t actually die; she was just growing up as Katy Perry – yes, the famous singer. Of course, this is probably not true, but it’s a theory that’s made headlines nonetheless.
Dinosaurs didn’t go extinct millions of years ago
How could paleontologists be so darn stupid? Everyone knows God created all animals – big and small – a few days before he fashioned Eve from Adam’s rib. So how could have dinosaurs lived millions of years before us? We think that, most probably, either God planted fossils and dinosaur bones in sediments to test our faith, or – and this is more likely, because it’s mentioned in the Bible – dinosaurs roamed the Earth with humans. In fact, that’s what Job 40:15-17 describes:
“Behold now behemoth, which I made with thee; he eateth grass as an ox.
Lo now, his strength is in his loins, and his force is in the navel of his belly.
He moveth his tail like a cedar: the sinews of his stones are wrapped together.”
The Dark Ages are a lie
The years between the fall of the Roman Empire and the Renaissance is called the Dark Ages. Those silly archaeologists and historians call it the Dark Ages because most people didn’t know how to read or write, many got killed in wars and plagues, and art wasn’t exactly flourishing. Then, in 1991, German historian Heribert Illig finally had an epiphany; this period in history couldn’t have happened because there isn’t enough evidence to prove it. Go figure!
Saddam Hussein had a Stargate
Those dumb journalists know nothing… nothing, I tell you! The war in Iraq was fought because Saddam Hussein had a Stargate that was going to let aliens in and take over the world. Thank God America saved us from that kerfuffle.
The Moon is a hologram
NASA wasn’t founded so it could unravel the mysteries of the universe, but rather, the universe was invented so that NASA could make money for the US government. That also includes the moon, which is projected into the sky to make stupid citizens such as you and myself believe that NASA went to the moon and that people can go up to space. But it’s not real. It’s all just a mirage.
I think I need a drink now, but do let us know if you’ve got more insane conspiracy theories to divulge.
You’ve heard James’s drill… Let us know in the comment section below.