The earliest recorded concept of a sex doll that we have dates back to the 17th century, when dolls made of old clothing, called dames de voyage, were brought on board ships for sailors to make use of on long journeys. There must’ve been a lot of seamen about… Get it? Seamen? Sem- yeah, you get it.

These then evolved into today’s blow up models, sporting vinyl, silicone and latex as primary materials. The more silicone used in the model of your choice, the higher the realism and the price.

However, these could well become passé in the not so distant future, as new advancements in technology are being geared towards sex robots, or sexbots. However, Dr Kathleen Richardson from De Montfort University has already set up a campaign against their introduction, as the idea may strengthen derogatory notions of the role of partners within a relationship.

As little girls, the closest thing we ever got to having an interactive robot was a Tamagotchi. A few years down the line, some of us put aside this virtual pet and invested in one of Ann Summers’ pleasurable paraphernalia. Both gadgets require an intimate connection with their owner… especially the Rampant Rabbit. Both have buttons for control and adjustment, and both require and offer endearment in their own way. Not all gadgets give you that. You can’t develop an affectionate bond with your microwave.

Now, scientists are jazzing things up to a whole new level. Your purple dildo now comes with corporeal attachments. Yes, the abs and rock hard butt cheeks are included in the price with a five year warranty. Sexbots could possibly be developed into fully interactive cyborgs, with the cognitive capacity to form a fortuitous relationship with its owner.

The possibilities are endless. For all we know, in 10 years’ time, you’ll be able to walk into the appliance section at the supermarket and order a custom-made Chris Evans cyborg that’s hung like a horse and comes with a BMW Z4. You can even program it to do the dishes every night

They haven’t even made them yet and I already know what I’m getting for Christmas 2035.

However, it’s hard not to point out that several major ethical issues would arise if these robots had to come to fruition.

Humans bond with humans. They become one and multiply. They share thoughts, stories, mistakes, arguments, experiences, good curries, glasses of wine, holidays, children, grandchildren, highs and lows. Sparks fly and souls conjoin. You can’t do that with a robot.



No matter how sophisticated the cyborgs may get, they won’t have a soul. Their owners wouldn’t be bonding with another spirit. The fact that I’m referring to one of the partners as the owner brings out a very sordid side to all this, and proves that a relationship such as this could never be on equal par with a human couple.

So why all the fuss? Well, the war zone that is the modern dating scene gives you plenty of opportunities to tread on a few mines and get your heart broken repeatedly. It’s exhausting and soul-breaking. Therefore, wouldn’t it just be easier to side step all this and buy a partner that you can program to suit all your needs? Sounds blissful, but then people would have to compete with artificial intelligence to find a partner. Not only that, but couples might start to disband in favour of these sexbots. Imagine if your dad had to break up with your mum for, quite literally, a younger model?

Dad: Honey, I’d like you to meet your step-mum, MSV31587 XLL.

MSV31587XLL: Oh, but you can call me Jenny for short.

And what of procreation? Do you simply order samples from sperm banks and install them into the penis cartridge? Refills at €30. My imagination doesn’t stretch far enough to fathom the workings of a robot womb.

Then again, scientists might be developing these sexbots for humanitarian purposes. By providing sexual gratification through a non-living entity, people might become less likely to contribute towards the human trafficking industry. Less minors and exploited individuals would be abused of, and punters wouldn’t be doing anything illegal, provided they do it in private spaces. To quote Derek Trotter in Only Fools and Horses, “If some pervo wants to get it going with half a pound of latex and a lump of oxygen, well that’s his business.” The important thing is that no one is being exploited.



I recently saw Jennifer Haley’s The Nether at the Courtyard Theatre. The story tells of a futuristic virtual world specifically created for paedophiles and sex offenders to physically log on and live out fantasies with another logged on holograph of a minor, who’d be role played by an adult. The debate in the plot questioned the morality of the virtual world. If the children in the virtual world were holographic, then no abuse was happening at all. They’re not real, so no one is guilty of child abuse. Is the existence of this virtual world encouraging sex offenders to prey on minors in the real world, or does it curb their urges? Parallels can be drawn with the sexbots in question. They’re not living entities, and so engaging in sexual activity with them is not illegal or immoral.

On the other hand, owners might become accustomed to the robot’s one-dimensionalism, and get into the habit of just seeing other men or women as accommodating sex objects. Forming a habit with sexbots might harper a decrease in social skills or a lack of consideration.

However, some people might be unsuccessful in finding a human partner. Let’s be honest, we all know of someone who’s just so socially inept that you’re thinking, ‘Ye, he/she’s going to end up with a sexbot.’ You’re a cruel human being for thinking that.

I’m joking. It’s ok to have such thoughts. So, could sexbots be the key to the lonely? If that dry spell is turning out to be a lifetime, wouldn’t they deserve to have some form of companionship? Beggars can’t be choosers, I suppose.


Would you get a sexbot if you’re unlucky in love? What other impacts would they have on society?

Let us know in the comment section below.