They say that time can heal anything …
What they didn’t tell us is that it wouldn’t manage to rid our society of these atrocious fashion faux pas.
Although I’ve no talent at all when it comes to putting an avant-garde outfit together, I do like to dress well and invest in classic pieces.
The knowledge I’ve acquired thus far comes from a lifetime of keeping things simple, of reading fashion magazines and of being told off by mother – who is a star when it comes to personal style.
But sometimes I wonder: Are certain people blind?
Yes, my friends, when it comes to certain faux pas, it’s not a question of ‘Who are they wearing?’ but of ‘Why the hell would they wear that?’
Sandals and socks: There are two reasons why you would wear sandals: it’s hot outside, or you want to be able to take off your shoes really quickly. Wearing socks with sandals makes both those reasons futile – not to mention that they look… ma nafx… silly?
Dungarees: Do you really want to look like a kangaroo? Are you sure that wasn’t the look you were going for when you left the house? Because that’s all I can think of when I see people wearing dungarees.
Leggings as trousers: How long has it been since the invention of leggings? Ten, fifteen, thirty years? And STILL many people have not understood how leggings work. They’re not meant to be used as trousers because they’re a cross between underwear and outerwear. Your bum should always be covered by a long top or jacket and make sure your ankles are covered too, please!
Stripper heels: Always keep this in mind: the rule is that the higher the heel, the more likely you are to get it wrong. That’s because, in our collective subconscious, ultra-high heels are worn by strippers and Lady Gaga. Thankfully, Lady Gaga can pull off stripper heels because the freedom to be eccentric is one of the perks of being famous (hence, why Russell Brand’s hairdo was a ‘thing’ five years ago). Please don’t wear stripper heels if you’re twelve years old, however; or if you’re a hundred and twelve years old; or if you’re not super famous. In fact, just, please, stop wearing stripper heels!
Top of boxers showing through: I’m not going to get into the whole debate of whether ‘boxers are only hot in a boxing ring’, but I’ll tell you this: it is called Underwear because it’s meant to be underneath your clothing. So if you want to titillate our imagination, please keep it that way, boys.
Do you agree with Evelyn that these are faux pas?
Are there any others she should have mentioned? Let us know!