I lost mine when I was 17 – a shocker considering I’m now in the 40+ age bracket. Was it a good thing? Should I have waited? When is it a good time to lose your virginity anyway?

There is something mystical about our virginity; like it’s something supernatural and sacred. It’s something we’re told to hold dear while, at the same time, it’s almost a sin to reach your 20s and still be a virgin. It’s a concept that really divides people into two categories and one that the State, the Church and many other entities seem to want to control.

But, really and truly, is our virginity really that much of a big deal?


Time after time we’re told to lose it to someone worthy of us and someone who likes us for who we are, rather than someone who just wants to sleep with us and leave us by the wayside. We’re told not to be ‘sluts’ and we’re told not to be ‘prudes,’ but how the hell have we got to the point where everyone seems to think that they have a right to an opinion in this matter?

Our virginity is our own. And people really need to stop being shocked, scandalised or even disappointed in how, where, why and when we lose it.

Growing up, my parents were very protective and they always insisted that I should wait till I get married to have sex. Obviously, with me being Evelyn, I didn’t really pay much attention, and did it with a pretty boy while on a night out.

Truth be told, I’m still not sure how I had managed to convince my mother to allow me to go out to the talkies (that’s the ‘cinema’ for anyone younger than 40) and stay out late. She must have been in a good mood, or something.

It felt great to be out and that illusionary sense of independence made me feel invincible. I don’t regret losing my virginity that night, it’s the choice of person that I have sometimes questioned. Also, it wasn’t illegal to have sex at 17 back then, so the only shame, if I still had any at that point, was from the indoctrination I had received all my life.

Nevertheless, I moved on and I’ve come to believe that the right time to lose your virginity is when you – and only you – feel it’s right. Never let anyone pressure you into it or bully you into not doing it. In other words, so long as you are of age and the other person is someone you want to do it with, go for it

BUT, make sure you take precautions:

  • Avoid doing it while you’re really drunk although being a little tipsy might make it more fun.
  • Avoid doing it without protection getting knocked up, or knocking a girl up, on your first time is not exactly a wise decision; not to mention the STIs you might be exposing yourself to.
  • And always make sure you’re emotionally ready for it.

For the rest, let the world say what it wants. It’s time people got the custody of their own bodies back.

Do you agree with Evelyn?

When do you think is the right time for a person to lose his or her virginity?

Let us know in the comments section below.