The Change beyond Fear

© Les and Dave Jacobs/Corbis

Whether positive or negative, every change is the beginning of a new phase in our lives. This can be quite daunting since it includes an element of the unknown. The lack of knowledge of what is to come can be exciting for those who are adventurous, but may elicit anxiety and fear in those who are more conservative. Yet, unless we take that first step we will never really know.

Somehow, once we find ourselves confronted with a situation we adapt, settle in and succeed. Failure to take that first step will hinder any kind of growth in our lives. Let’s face it, in the long run we often realise that most of our fears are unfounded anyway. Fear acts like a barrier stopping us from achieving great things, from reaching self-realisation and from acknowledging our self -worth. Beyond that fear is a new challenging, but very exciting adventure.

One way of controlling fear is by reducing choice. If we are in a position in which something must be done, we usually just get on with it. This happens very often in our place of work – when our superiors demand that we do something, or go somewhere, we make sure that we deliver. We really have no option if we want to keep our jobs. However, out of a controlled set up, if we are trying to build something for ourselves:-

  •  we are not bound by time;
  •  we have complete freedom;
  •  we have other competing pressures; and
  •  worst of all we are entirely responsible for the outcome

Now, that can be truly SCARY!

In this situation, coaching can be very helpful since the coach brings an objective perspective to the situation. The client also feels accountable and therefore ‘pressured’ to start taking certain steps towards achieving the ultimate goal. The coach offers a plan and helps maintain focus whilst offering support and motivation, enabling the client to make the correct choices.

The individual can also control fear by concentrating exclusively on the ultimate target – what you really want, rather than what you think you may get. Strive for excellence and don’t be satisfied until you get there.

Most important of all: START. In the beginning, you will have to do things beyond your comfort zone; things you would usually rather not do. Basically, you have to go in the opposite direction that your fear is suggesting.

Any change in life requires a high dose of determination. A nestling learns how to fly when mother bird pushes him out of the nest. At that point, he can either fall, or flap his wings and fly. I encourage you all to make the choice to flap your wings and soar to success.