The 5 Steps To Starting Over In Life

Shannon Lell

No matter how good or bad things get, you should always remember that your journey in life comes about as a result of the choices you make. If you want to change, here’s how you do it.

Many people go through life thinking that there’s a giant blackboard in the heavens with their story written down on it and, no matter how hard they try, their destiny is sealed. But more often than not, if we sit down and truly think about everything that’s happened to us, it’s very easy to see that we were the ones who took the decision to do or not do something; to go after someone or to let them go.

The bad news is that no matter which path you choose in life, bad things will happen and there will be days when you regret your choice. But if that feeling takes over your whole life, if everyday you curse your job and your spouse and the fact that you woke up to another crappy day in this crappy life, then maybe it’s time you changed track.

How? The steps are simple, the only thing that you need is determination.

Don’t resist change. Let’s be honest, we’re all scared of the unknown and that’s exactly what change is. When things are changing we have no idea where they might lead us. But have faith in yourself and remember that when you’re driving you don’t see the whole road but you know that there is a destination that you will get to.

Take time to mull over the past. Gandhi used to say that ‘forgiveness is a virtue of the brave’. He was right, of course, but what he forgot to add was that forgetting is for the stupid. Learn from your mistakes, forgive others and forgive yourself and move on, but always keeping in mind how you ended up here and where you’d like to get.

Sort out your relationships. We often have people in our lives who don’t give us anything. Now that might sound selfish, but I don’t only mean physical or material gifts. Even a sense of satisfaction or pride or love is enough to make a relationship worthwhile. But if you have someone who is constantly draining you with requests or who constantly deceives you, let them be.

Know where you stand. If you’re lost, what’s the first thing you do? You find your bearings! Do the same with your life. Figure out where you are. Sit down and categorise your life in terms of money, career, health and relationships. Figure out which area(s) of your life you’re not happy with and where you stand in all of them.

Plan your journey. Once you know where you are, you can start thinking about where you could go. Know exactly where you want to get and make sure that you work towards that goal each and everyday. You’ll be surprised how quickly you’ll manage to turn your dreams into reality.


What do you think of James’s advice? Do you agree? Is there anything he left out? Let us know!