“I dated a man for three months and then he left me for another woman. I don’t know why he did this but I decided to be alone. After this disappointment in love I did not want see any man. After two years alone I am ready to see if I can be lucky now.”
How often do we hear this typical, sad and unnecessary story. Even the most intelligent can lose their brains to Love and get caught again and again. Surely it is time to enter relationships with a different motto, still with heart open, but with a simple protection in place, ideally with both parties verbally agreeing to the same:
No expectations – N0 disappointments, a step towards lasting conscious relationships.
Of course the fear of losing the new partner keeps most silent. It is like putting no oil in the engine, and hoping it will not seize up. If we can’t be honest with ourselves, and the other person, from the start, communicating our feelings, it is likely that disappointment is just weeks, months, or years away.
We talk of trust and loyalty, but if we don’t communicate with each other to express our true desires and expectations, trust and loyalty are hollow words based on unshared assumptions.
If one does not want to make a commitment, tell the other the exact reasons, so they don’t feel rejected by love, it was just not the right pairing, and start again without two years of grief and healing.
If it works for both, move from N0 Expectations to Commitment with mutual agreement.