ENJOYING ONE’S OWN COMPANY

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In this fast moving world, it’s often difficult to shut yourself from the rest of the physical and virtual realms of society. At times, you might feel that all your energy has been sucked out of you, leaving you bare as you struggle with your everyday chores. Restoring it might mean having to spend some time alone, and some need this time more often and for longer periods than others.

People have been raised in different families, and some assume that quietness denotes sadness or negativity. I learnt this when I started working. For me, it was natural to spend some stretches of time on my own. Some people might think that saying very little is a sign that something is wrong. While I appreciate some people’s genuine concern, I wish they could understand that some of us just need to disconnect to connect again. It’s not that I hate being in the presence of people, it’s just that I can take it in smaller doses, at least at the time being.

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I’ve noticed that in the last few years, I’ve seemed to distance myself much more often from the cacophony of the outside world. Perhaps this is due to the fact that becoming an adult means having to deal with more things by myself, and I find that I need to find my own voice amidst the bombardment of information around me. I feel that my concentration and productivity increases in this way. After a day’s work, it helps to disconnect in order to replenish myself. This is especially true for jobs that require continuous interaction with others such as mine. If, on the other hand, your job doesn’t expect it of you to communicate frequently with others, you might actually crave more social interaction.

Some people like to work in pairs and they function better when they make decisions with others. Others might feel overwhelmed by being constantly in connection with others. Socialising is healthy, but so is finding your true self on your own. Balance is key. Thinking things through to come to certain conclusions is a process best done in the silence of your own company. It’s easier to come up with solutions when you concentrate on your own. It allows you to engage yourself in deep thought. It makes you connect with yourself and understand who you are and how you analyse. Being on your own can unleash your creative side, giving rise to ideas that you can develop.

In spending time on your own and understanding yourself on a more intimate level, you’ll also be able to enhance the quality of your relationships with others. When I feel refreshed and replenished after spending time on my own, I have more energy to be with others. This is how I I recharge my batteries. For me, spending time on my own is a necessity, not a luxury. This means that sometimes, disconnection from online social media such as Facebook is a must as well.

We must be tolerant of the fact that, despite being aware that enjoying one’s own company is healthy, for some people this need is much greater. We shouldn’t get angry if a friend feels like staying on their own. It is of course polite from our end to extend the hand of help or to offer to lend an ear, but in the end we shouldn’t probe if they feel the need to have some alone time. Enjoying our own company is crucial, as we are the only person we carry around with us all the time. Ultimately, we need to be our own best friend.

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