Dating the ‘Perfect Woman’

Message from Neville:

I am 22 years old and I am having problems when it comes to finding the perfect woman. Only women who are between one and ten years older than me are friendly towards me and treat me like a man. But the problem is that they don’t want to date me. When it comes to women who are younger than me, they not only don’t want to date me but they don’t want to be friends with me either.

Dear Neville,

No woman is ‘perfect’, just as no man is perfect. Everyone has flaws and defects, but sometimes, it is these things which bring people closer together. You must try to find the woman who is perfect FOR YOU.

First of all, decide what you want at this point in your life. Do you want a partner or just someone to have fun with? Are you perhaps focusing too much on outward appearances? How about trying another approach?

In this day and age, the internet can be a powerful means of making new friendships and starting new relationships. Why don’t you, for example, try joining a Facebook group or a group of people within a website or blog who share your same interests or outlook? Another idea would be to ask your friends whether they have noticed something about your approach, maybe you come on too strong when you first start talking to a girl whom you have just met, or maybe you are too shy – friends’ opinions and outlooks can sometimes show us the way to mend bad habits.

Most of the time, the harder we try in matters of love, the more we find ourselves searching for something ephemeral using the wrong path. Stop trying so hard, and maybe the rest will follow. We all go through lonely times in our lives, where we yearn for something which seems impossible, yet nothing actually is. Focus on yourself, improve your knowledge and revise other aspects of your life. A responsible and well-rounded person is more likely to interest women searching for a partner than a naive wide-eyed young man.

Most of all, don’t let anyone take advantage of you. Sadly, many women seem to target young men earnestly searching for a girlfriend. They focus on manipulating them into emptying their pockets, string them along with promises of love or sex, while secretly making fun of them behind their backs with their friends. When you find that girl whom you think is truly interested in you, make sure she really wants to get to know YOU, and not use you for her own ends.

Don’t worry, it may take weeks, months, or perhaps even years, but the right one will come. Be patient and don’t focus your life on picking up any woman whose appearance sparks your interest, but on searching for a kindred spirit with whom you can share yourself.

Good luck!