HOW TO HANDLE BEING SINGLE WHEN EVERYONE ELSE IS GETTING MARRIED

Is everyone getting married? And where does that leave little, old, single me? If like me you’ve asked yourself these questions, you need to read this …

I swear, in my 40+ years, I have never received so many wedding invitations at one go. Just a few weeks ago, I had six weddings in one weekend – six! I mean… the only things I should be doing in sixes are cocktails at happy hour and cigarettes once I’m tipsy.

But, anyway, I’ve realised that my cynicism at all these weddings is stemming from the fact that I have found myself single for the first time in a long time, and my invitations have gone from ‘Evelyn Buonasorte Borg & <partner’s name>’ to that horrible ‘Evelyn Buonasorte Borg & Guest’ – It’s like they don’t care who I bring along, so long as I don’t walk in on my own.

Well, screw it! I’m single and this is how I plan to deal with all these weddings:

Look Amazing: Nothing says ‘I’m single out of choice’ than looking amazing. While other people are busy planning their weddings, I’m going to be hitting the gym and doing my yoga because I don’t need a man in my life.

Take a Friend: If I have to go to six weddings in one weekend, I am going to make the most of it. That’s why I have my designated wedding friends, who I take with me and get drunk with. So, if you go to a wedding anytime soon and you see two middle-aged (there, I said it) single women laughing in a corner with a Sex on the Beach in one hand and a barquette in the other – it’s probably us.

Try Something New: When relationships end, it is usually the end of an era. It also means that it’s the beginning of a new one, so I am going to make the most of mine. Being single gives you a mental and emotional freedom you simply can’t experience in a relationship, and I’m going to channel that into something productive – like going on hikes to tone my legs.

Shopping: Whether you’re a man or a woman, retail therapy is the ultimate medicine and cure. When I feel down and lonely, I say screw it and go out and buy something I like or want (but never something I need, as that defeats the purpose). And what’s better, when someone says “I’ve just got engaged” you can reply with “I’ve just got this pair of shoes… And they’ll never break my heart”.

 

Defences Up: People will always judge you for being single. If you’re down, they’ll think you’re weak; if you’re happy, they’ll think you’re unnatural, and if you’re assertive, they’ll think you’re holding a grudge. The trick is to let people be and to remember that keeping a bed warm by yourself, cooking for one, and putting on a smile while others are getting married is not easy, but you do it – and if you’re strong enough to do that, then who are they to judge?

Do you agree with Evelyn? Is there anything else you’d like to add to this? Let us know!